Relational Aggression
With the recent press of girl fights on the news, my thoughts were focused on how violent girls are getting with each other.Relational aggression is the "silent and emotional" damage girls already inflict on one another, but now they are throwing fists as common as a handshake.
In the book, "See Jane Hit: Why Girls Are Growing More Violent and What We Can Do About It", by James Garbarino, he views girls in general are evidencing a new assertiveness and physicality in their participation in sports, open sensuality & enjoyment of “normal” aggression that boys have long enjoyed. He says the good news of liberation and the bad news of increased aggression is the New American Girl. Compared to other societies, American women are liberated, but how does this affect young girls?
“The result has been the unleasing of girls from the oppression of the old patriarchal values and social structures and the corresponding blossoming of opportunities of all kinds,” Garbarino says, which leads to mixed messages in American society.
According to the U.S. Dept. of Justice, 25 years ago, for every 10 arrested for assault, there was only one girl. Now there are only four boys arrested for each girl arrested. Garbarino believes that because at the same time that girls are being liberated from many of the constraints of rigid and oppressive sexual stereotypes, they have been confronting an ever more toxic social environment. It seems that young girls are confused with the many mixed messages thrown around by society. On one hand, they are being taught to stand up for themselves, fight back and being pushed to keep up with the boys on the sports field. On the other hand, there are still messages of “play nice, be quiet, wear pink and don’t be assertive.”
Garbarino also belives that young children (boys and girls) start out being equally aggressive, but over time their behaviors take separate paths. Boys remain (for the most part) physically aggressive, while girls develop more social competence and don’t need physical aggression to get their way. Girls have been told it’s not feminine to hit, therefore they hone their emotional, verbal and passive way of dealing with certain issues or conflicts, which leads into adolescent RA behavior-using words and manipulating feelings.
I believe parents and teachers need to open and more aware/involved in the behavior displayed at school and at home, addressing inappropriate actions and rewarding good ones.
There are some programs already in the works for girls that address relational aggression and physical violence among their peers. The Ophelia Project has a relationship camp for girls, along with clubs, classes and pamphlets about healthy peer friendships. Friend to Friend is a school-based group for African American girls in Philadelphia that promotes healthy peer friendships and gives girls an outlet for the stress that occurs in school on a daily basis.
posted by erin @ 11:27 PM
<< Home